Wednesday, February 29, 2012

It's for me.

I've met someone online and it turned out he is a friend of a friend - and that mutual friend gave me the green light. "He's a good guy." Fortunately, we were chatting before we figured out we had a mutual friend.

It's long distance, too. We both travel quite a bit for our jobs and happened to cross paths during our travels - which is how we met.

We're in that 3-hour-phone-call-nightly phase - and it feels good. I'm struggling with keeping things in perspective, but I'm managing not to get beside myself. Long-distance isn't easy - I know this - but the number of things we have in common just make it uncanny:

  • He's black - was married to a Puerto Rican woman. I'm Puerto Rican - was married to a black woman.
  • We both divorced 7 years ago
  • We both have two kids. One boy and One girl each.
  • He's in the same business as our mutual friend and the two of them were on the same business trip together when he and I met.
  • We both live in one city 70% of the time, and both spend 30% of our time in a different city.
  • We both do the 70/30 thing because our kids are in one city and work in the other
  • We both have very close relationships with our ex-inlaws
  • The Bronx is where he spends that 30% of his time - I was born in the Bronx and my momma still lives there.

We learned a lot about each other talking for quite a while now - and notice how nothing above has any relation to sex. It's just personality here. We've discussed meeting in person and what the hell happens if we hit it off in person and decide it's worth pursuing further ... and we're both willing to work it out, travel, etc. I know long distance isn't easy, I say again ... but it seems like it could allow me to focus on raising my kids when I'm in daddy mode, without someone local wanting to see me, or being jealous of the time I keep exclusive to my kids. It seems like it would allow me to focus on work when I'm supposed to be focused on work. I don't know - I compartmentalize and it seems like it would work alright.

If I still have readers - I'm sure you'll post your opinions. Let me have it.


  1. I won't say anything because I'll be waiting for your call so we can dish *side eye*

  2. I will say this, if it is right, then you will know. I know you may feel like you have gotten it wrong in the past but falling in love is sort of like when you are trying to regain trust. The only way to regain trust is to trust again and the only way to find love is to seek again. I support you fully and just keep your eyes peeled and remember COMMUNICATION, COMMUNICATION and PATIENCE! and you will be just fine. Have fun with it.

  3. I forgot about this. We met - it wasn't the same in person for me. It was definitely cool while it lasted